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  %DEPENDENT SELF ESTEEM ISSUES CONTROL LOVE SECURE 971105
                                                                                                                                     
           People  differ  in what factors play major  roles  in                                     
      generating their their self-esteem;  i.e.  their sense  of                                                      
      self-worth.  There are healthy factors for self-esteem ---                                                      
      and unhealthy factors for self-esteem.    Healthy  factors                                                      
      for self-esteem are less likely to lead to perversions  of                                                      
      self-esteem than are unhealthy factors.    Whether or  not                                                      
      factors   for  self-esteem  do lead to perverse  forms  of                                                      
      self-esteem  ---   depends upon many considerations  which               
      may or may not be recognized.                                                                                                  
                                                                                                                                     
           We  may  point  to  self-esteem with  many  words  or               
      phrases  ---   because of how  important  self-esteem  is.                          
      Self-esteem  is always a reflexive reality;   i.e.  having     
      to  do with how self views self.     Thus the words  which                                               
      point  to  self-esteem start with the word  "self"    plus                                                      
      word(s)  such as follow:                                                                                                       
                                                                                                                                     
                                ESTEEM                                                                                               
                               ACCOUNT                                                                                               
                             DESCRIPTION                                                                                             
                              AWARENESS                                                                                              
                                WORTH                                                                                                
                                REGARD                                 
                                VALUE                                                 
                              ESTIMATION                                                                                             
                            CONSIDERATION                                                                                            
                               RESPECT                                      
                              PERCEPTION        
                             APPRECIATION                                                                                            
                              ENJOYMENT                                                                                              
                                 VIEW                                                                                                
                                 CARE                                                                                                
                              ATTENTION                                                                                              
                               CONCERN                               
                                 LOOK                                                                                                
                              DEFERENCE                                                                                              
                                PRIDE                                                                                                
                              ADMIRATION                                                                                             
                               APPROVAL                                                                                              
                                HONOR                                                                                                
                                MERIT                                                                                                
                                                                                                                                     
           Perversions  of  self esteem usually have to do  with                                                      
      the following:                                                                                                                 
                                                                                                                                     
                               Conceit.                               
                              Arrogance.                                                                                             
                             Rejections.                                                                                             
                             Exclusions.                       
                             Addictions.                                                
                             Insecurity.                                                                                             
                             Selfishness.                                                      
                             Alienations.                                        
                             Exclusivity.                       
                           Contentiousness.                
                           Pretentiousness.                                                                                          
                           Disintegrations.                                                                   
                          Excommunications.                                                                
                         Self righteousness.       
                         Being out-of-touch.                                                             
                        Unresolved conflicts.                                              
                    Preoccupations with conflicts.                                              
                   Preoccupations with appearances.                                                                                  
                  Being out of contact with reality.                                                             
                Preoccupation with issues of control.                                                           
              Regarding others as "trash", "expendable".                                 
             Putting self inappropriately before others.                                                      
             Regarding others as of less worth than self.                                 
                                                                                                                                     
           Communities  which are confused about the  difference                                     
      between   healthy  forms  of self-esteem,   and  unhealthy                                                      
      forms   of   self-esteem,    are  likely  to    experience                                   
      personal  and communal  disintegration.   It is prudent to                                                                
      be  aware  of,  name,    and talk about what  factors  are                                                                     
      likely to lead  to healthy self-esteem ---  and what other                                                      
      factors are likely to lead towards unhealthy self-esteem.                                                      
                                                                                                                                     
                               (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
         Download it!     (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                                     
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