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 %COMMAND RULE REGULATE PROHIBIT LAW REQUIRE PUNISH+940302
  %EXAMPLE ROLE MODEL MENTOR TEACH PARENT LOVE SHOW+940302
 %TEACHER STUDENT LEARN EDUCATE TRAIN CLASS LECTURE+940302
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%STORY PARABLE EPIC PICTURE IMAGE ACCOUNT MUSIC FIX 940302

     Different   paradigms  lead  to  different  kinds  of
inter-personal  relationships.     Some  paradigms lead to
attempts   to  be   in   control   through  the   use   of
commandments, rules, regulations,    prohibitions,   laws,
requirements,    and punishments.   They rarely succeed in
bearing sweet fruit.

     Some  paradigms  lead  through  the presentation   of
examples,  role models, mentors, teachers, parents,  love,
shows,  stories,  parables, epic tales, pictures,  images,
personal  accounts,   music,  etc.   The often bear  sweet
fruit.

     By    their   fruits  we  may  know  the   difference
between  alienative    and    integrative  paradigms. Wise
people   take note  of the differences  between  paradigms
which  bear sweet fruits  and  those  which  bear   bitter
fruits;     and   act accordingly.    Wise people  do  not
return  again  and   again  to paradigms which bear bitter
fruit.

     The truth is more often known  through affirmations--
-than  through  denials;    through  exemplary behavior---
than through  commandments;  through conflict resolutions-
--than  through   overcoming   in   conflicts;     through
tolerance  and forgiveness---than through  conviction  and
convicting.

     Personal   and  communal  integrity are  more   often
encouraged  through  gifts  of the  freedom to  be  safely
vulnerable  in  open  and honest  intimate dialogue  about
personal      experiences---than      through     coercive
expectations   and    demands  of  conformity;     through
descriptions    of    trees and  paradigms  bearing  sweet
versus    bitter  fruit---than through prescriptions which
forbid people  to  think about or yield to  the temptation
to pick  sweet  fruit  from  the trees and paradigms which
bear sweet   fruit   of  the  knowledge  of the difference
between sweet and bitter fruit.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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