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 %CLEAR EXCLUSIVE ALTERNATE CHOICE HONEST INTEGRITY 911227

     To  live with integrity we must often  name  describe
and discuss  clear alternative choices among  alternatives
which   face us.   It is  sometimes  not clear to us which
alternatives are really mutually exclusive,   are  choices
which we can avoid making.  The difference between what is
possible and  what  is  impossible  as regards integrating
alternative  choices,   is  often  not a clear difference;
especially if  we are playing collusive  games  of  mutual
self deception as do addicts and codependents.

     We cannot physically spend the full day on a  Pacific
Holiday  Beach,  and also at work on the floor of the  New
York Stock Exchange.   If we are a broker who works on the
floor of the New York Stock Exchange,  on any given day we
must  choose  between  the  two places.    If  we  pretend
otherwise, we are in deep trouble!

     We  cannot  be a perfectionist who  attend  to  every
little detail, as if life depended upon every detail being
perfectly  in  order;   and  at the same  time  live  with
personal integrity.   If we pretend otherwise,  we are  in
deep trouble!

     We  cannot act as if every person with a problem whom
we  become aware of is a person who calls for  our  expert
attention  and  skill;   and at the same  time  live  with
personal integrity.   If we pretend otherwise,  we are  in
deep trouble!

     Clarity  about  alternatives  is  impossible  without
honesty about what is possible and what is impossible.  If
we are pretending that we are free of limits, we cannot be
clear about alternatives which face us, and we cannot make
wise  choices  between  mutually  exclusive  alternatives.
Eventually our pretense disintegrates as we  disintegrate.
We daily choose between pretentiousness and integrity.  If
we pretend otherwise, we disintegrate.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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