This is http://www.essayz.com/a9007131.htm         
Previous-Essay      <== This-Essay ==>     Following-Essay
Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words.
{Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.}
==========================================================
%CODEPENDENT DETACH SELF ADDICTIVE PROFESSION TRUTH 900713

     It  is  difficult  for codependents  and  addicts  to
detach  themselves from each other and from the  attitudes
which  lead  them  to view their  relationships  as  "true
love".   This is so even if most members of the  community
regard  their relationship as unhealthy.  Honest emotional
detachment  is difficult even if they have  intellectually
acknowledged  that there are many clear signs  which  show
unmistakably   that  their  relationships  are   unhealthy
relationships.

     It   is   FAR  MORE  DIFFICULT  to  detach  from   an
addictive/codependent relationship if:

     1)  You    are   actively   participating    in    an
addictive/codependent  relationship for which there are no
generally   acknowledged  clear  signs  which   show   the
relationship to be an unhealthy relationship.

     2)  The   community  regards  the   relationship   as
respectable and worthy of support.

     3)  The  vast  majority of  the  participants in  the
relationship  together  in  a coherent way form  a  highly
respected  and well supported professional group which  is
regulated by legal and/or professional standards of proper
conduct.

     4)  The  profession views itself  and  is  viewed  by
others as an essential service profession.

     5)  You  have  come from  a  dysfunctional family  of
origin   and  operates  in  terms  of  a  full  range   of
characteristically   addictive   attitudes  and  ways   of
rationalizing conclusions arrived at for obscure emotional
reasons.

     6)  You  are  unaware  of  the  messages  from   your
childhood  which  motivate and direct much of  your  daily
life  and  personal  reactions to what  are  perceived  as
threatening circumstances.

     7)  The  similarities  between  the  dynamics of  the
professional  group  and the dynamics of a more  obviously
addictive fellowship have not been clearly articulated; or
have  been articulated only in underground writings  which
do  not receive any sympathetic consideration and  support
in the wider community.

     Under  such  circumstances detachment from  dishonest
participation   in  professional  games  of  mutual   self
deception  is  unlikely.  Professional  consultations  are
likely  to discourage any tentative thoughts of detachment
and  discourage any beginning of movement  towards  honest
personal responses to professional situations.  Detachment
is bound to appear to be equivalent to suicide under  such
circumstances,   and very few people have the  courage  to
commit suicide.

     Yet  such  suicidal detachment may  paradoxically  be
essential to healthy survival, for continued attachment to
dishonesty  will  lead  to the destruction of  all  living
things through war,  global warming,  resource exhaustion,
environmental  pollution,  and/or the general breakdown of
human health through dysfunctional addictive responses  to
dis-ease.  The professional games of mutual self deception
which  we play are games of life and death;  they are  not
the play of children, although the games are motivated and
lead by messages from us,  the children of our past,   who
were trapped in dysfunctional families of origin.

     To thine own self be true.

     Do what must be done to be true to yourself.

     The alternative is even more fearful!

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
==========================================================