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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9007131.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %CODEPENDENT DETACH SELF ADDICTIVE PROFESSION TRUTH 900713 It is difficult for codependents and addicts to detach themselves from each other and from the attitudes which lead them to view their relationships as "true love". This is so even if most members of the community regard their relationship as unhealthy. Honest emotional detachment is difficult even if they have intellectually acknowledged that there are many clear signs which show unmistakably that their relationships are unhealthy relationships. It is FAR MORE DIFFICULT to detach from an addictive/codependent relationship if: 1) You are actively participating in an addictive/codependent relationship for which there are no generally acknowledged clear signs which show the relationship to be an unhealthy relationship. 2) The community regards the relationship as respectable and worthy of support. 3) The vast majority of the participants in the relationship together in a coherent way form a highly respected and well supported professional group which is regulated by legal and/or professional standards of proper conduct. 4) The profession views itself and is viewed by others as an essential service profession. 5) You have come from a dysfunctional family of origin and operates in terms of a full range of characteristically addictive attitudes and ways of rationalizing conclusions arrived at for obscure emotional reasons. 6) You are unaware of the messages from your childhood which motivate and direct much of your daily life and personal reactions to what are perceived as threatening circumstances. 7) The similarities between the dynamics of the professional group and the dynamics of a more obviously addictive fellowship have not been clearly articulated; or have been articulated only in underground writings which do not receive any sympathetic consideration and support in the wider community. Under such circumstances detachment from dishonest participation in professional games of mutual self deception is unlikely. Professional consultations are likely to discourage any tentative thoughts of detachment and discourage any beginning of movement towards honest personal responses to professional situations. Detachment is bound to appear to be equivalent to suicide under such circumstances, and very few people have the courage to commit suicide. Yet such suicidal detachment may paradoxically be essential to healthy survival, for continued attachment to dishonesty will lead to the destruction of all living things through war, global warming, resource exhaustion, environmental pollution, and/or the general breakdown of human health through dysfunctional addictive responses to dis-ease. The professional games of mutual self deception which we play are games of life and death; they are not the play of children, although the games are motivated and lead by messages from us, the children of our past, who were trapped in dysfunctional families of origin. To thine own self be true. Do what must be done to be true to yourself. The alternative is even more fearful! (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================