This is http://www.essayz.com/a9002041.htm         
Previous-Essay      <== This-Essay ==>     Following-Essay
Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words.
{Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.}
==========================================================
  %UNBALANCED SELECTIVE COLLUSIVE ADDICTIVE HONESTY 900204

     In seeking to transcend the disintegrative effects of
collusions,    addictions   and   codependent   supportive
networks,   it  helps to understand the  manner  in  which
participants in them cooperate in misleading each other.

     Misleading communications and behaviors often achieve
their  effect through a selective lack of balance.   Often
statements  and behaviors mislead by focusing  exclusively
upon a limited range of the truth.  False impressions  are
created by what is excluded, left out, not said, not done;
in contrast to what is included,  said and done.  In  this
way  it is possible to be tragically misleading while  all
the time making true statements and behaving in legitimate
and   respectable  ways.   Yet  the  overall  pattern   is
dishonest.

     Participants    in   collusions,    addictions    and
codependent  support  networks participate  in  dishonesty
through  a compulsive imbalance which focuses  exclusively
on some things,  concerns,  desires, attitudes,  emotions,
values,  ideals, goals, people, activities,  etc.;  to the
exclusion  of  others  which are complementary  and  offer
essential  balance.   Health may be regained only  through
moving  towards a healthy balance among the possible  foci
of attention, concern, activities, etc.

     Any set of ideals, values, goals, etc.  which lead to
exclusive  attitudes  and behaviors tends to  lead  people
into  collusive,   addictive and codependent  patterns  of
perception, emotions, thought and behavior. The flaw is in
exclusivity,   and  in the imbalance  which  results  from
selective honesty.

     The  cure  for such unhealthy behavior is not  to  be
found  in  being sure that all individual  statements  and
behaviors  are  literally true,   objective,   legitimate,
respectable,    etc.   The  disease  does  not  reside  in
individual actions and communications;  but in the overall
pattern  of  actions and communications,  in the  lack  of
balance due to exclusivity.

     To  speak  of balance suggests a reference  direction
such  as the direction down when we speak of the  physical
balance  of a tight rope walker.  In the absence  of  some
criteria  for  wise  judgement the concept of  balance  is
without  power.   Clearly  such  a  criteria  must  be  an
inclusive one, rather than an exclusive criteria.

     The   criteria  must  be  integrative;   rather  than
analytic.   The  criteria must focus upon the balance  and
integrity  of the whole and its parts;  not only upon  the
nature,  relative value and importance of individual parts
to  the  exclusion  of others.  It must show  concern  for
relationships,   as much as concern for elements and their
essential characteristics.

     The integrity of the whole and its balance depends as
much  upon ACTUAL RELATIONSHIPS between elementary  parts,
as upon the nature of the parts and the ways in which they
may   relate   to   each  other.    Any   criteria   which
systematically  excludes  awareness of any aspect  of  the
whole  will  lead to  disintegration  through  collusions,
addictions  and  codependent support networks.   Thus  the
criteria  must  focus  as much  upon  patterns  of  ACTUAL
RELATIONSHIPS,  as upon the isolated individual parts  and
their characteristics and possible roles.

     The  integrity  of a whole community  is  inseparable
from  the  integrity  of the  members  of  the  community.
Members  of a community are not elementary parts which are
devoid  of  structure.  Members of a community  are  whole
beings created by the community relationships,  as much as
they  are  contributors  to the  community  as  individual
members of it.

     Members  of a community may or may not have  personal
integrity; may or may not be whole and healthy, as mirrors
of the community as a whole.  The community as a whole may
or may not have communal integrity;  i.e., may or more not
be whole and healthy, as a communal mirror of its members.
A  community  and  its members  mirror  each  other.   Any
criteria which isolates any aspect of the whole and treats
it as being the essence and/or most fundamental reality of
which the whole is constructed,  is a criteria which lacks
balance and integrity.

     Balance cannot be judged wisely by any criteria which
is  exclusively  concerned with:  objectivity,   analysis,
measurement,   computation,   manipulation,    prediction,
control,  achievement,  propriety, conformity,  consensus,
agreement,  legitimacy,  confirmation,  legality,  heresy,
and/or verification; for taken individually or selectively
in  concert they are not adequately inclusive of the whole
of  life.   There  is  more to a  healthy  individual  and
community   than  is  suggested  by  such  criteria  taken
individually or collectively in some selective way.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
==========================================================