This is http://www.essayz.com/a8909102.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %OPEN COVERT SECRET COLLUSIVE AFFIRMATION DENIAL 890910 Often the messages which are most important to us are conveyed in covert and secret ways, rather than in overt and open ways. Often the important covert messages are denials of the explicit and open messages. This process is not overtly explained or agreed upon; the process is itself a covert and secret process which it is taboo to analyze and discuss. The process is part of the collusive games of denial and mutual self deception which we play because due to the game we cannot bear to authentically share our beliefs, convictions, perceptions, relationships and other non-objective realities with each other openly and honestly. We cannot own them as our own. We cannot share them as our own. We pretend that they are not ours. We do not claim them. Often, however, by covert secret messages we affirm beliefs which are not our own, while at the same time pretending to convey openly and honestly what are in fact our own beliefs. At the same time that we are openly conveying our own beliefs in what may appear to be open and honest discourse, we convey our more important messages of denial and contradiction through covert and secret ways which involve threat and coercion. The whole process is very confusing to us and to others, yet we persist in the process because it is demanded by the rules of our collusive games of mutual self deception. So long as our most important and powerful messages are conveyed covertly and secretly, we lack personal and communal integrity and are in the process of disintegration. It is important to find ways to become free to convey our most important and powerful messages with both personal and communal integrity. How that is to be done is not entirely clear to us when we are engaged in covert and secret communications of contradictory messages. Yet, if we seek the truth, which is in us, eventually through it we can become free. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================