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                    %GUILT REJECTION DISINTEGRATION 870107

     Guilt   entails  self  rejection  and   so   personal
disintegration.  When Jack feels guilty it is because part
of  Jack is rejecting,  disintegration,  another  part  of
Jack.    Jack as judge finds that Jack the actor  has  not
conformed  to  the criteria for acceptability of Jack  the
judge.

     The  stage is set for a drama of  disintegration when
Jack accepts the plot and agrees to play the role of judge
with some criteria for  conditional acceptability;  and so
accepts  implicitly  the  possibility  of   disintegration
through self rejection.

     The  possibility of self rejection is not obvious  at
first.  What is initially  accepted  is the possibility of
the  acceptability  of friends in terms of  conformity  to
self's  standards  of what is acceptable behavior.    This
possibility is comfortable and  serves  self's  motives of
minimizing discomfort.

     Self is not comfortable with an incoherent pattern of
behavior and soon puts self in a double blind by accepting
the  concept that self should be acceptable under the same
criteria  that  self  chose  to  regard  others  as  being
acceptable;  with the stinger that this implies that  self
should  be  rejected if self does not  conform  to  chosen
criteria  of  acceptability  ---   chosen  under  communal
encouragement  not  entirely  controlled  by  self.    The
specific  criteria of acceptability can not be  chosen  in
any way to avoid the double blind; for  every  form of the
knowledge of good and  evil when used  as the criteria for
acceptability/rejection   leads  out  of  the  garden   of
personal and communal integrity which is heaven.  All such
technologies for the proper control of behavior entail the
disintegration  of the relationship between the judge  and
the judged, whether they be two or one.  This is why laws,
ethics, moralities, legalisms, etiquette,  etc.  are   not
successful means to personal and communal integrity.

     Love  does  not  attempt  to  achieve  personal   and
communal  integrity by threats of rejection as the way  to
coerce conformity.  Such threats lack integrity and so can
not   with   integrity  promote  personal   and   communal
integrity.
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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